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Anne
5 Star Member
Joined: 17 Nov 2007
Posts: 3292
Location: Pakistan |
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Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken.
Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one. |
hehehe. . .
Oh Banta...
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| Thu Dec 20, 2007 4:38 pm |
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shakeelmscw
Shayari Moderator
Joined: 22 Aug 2007
Posts: 5199
Location: United Arab Emirates |
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In an interview,
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. ....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...
_________________
*(`'·.¸(`'·.¸*¤*¸.·'´)¸.·'´)*
«´¨`·.Shakeel Ahmed ..·´¨`»
*(¸.·'´(¸.·'´*¤*`'·.¸)`'·.¸)*
(((**A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes**)) |
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| Thu Dec 20, 2007 4:38 pm |
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Anne
5 Star Member
Joined: 17 Nov 2007
Posts: 3292
Location: Pakistan |
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In an interview,
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. ....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup... |
hehehe...
Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup......... Woahhhhh
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| Thu Dec 20, 2007 4:41 pm |
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askari.z55
Senior Proud Pakistani
Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 1511
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سردار بلدیو سنگھ سڑک کے کنارے چلا جارہا تھا اچانک جب اس نے ایک دیوار پر لکھا ہوا دیکھا
“پڑھنے والا گدھا “
سردار بلدیو سنگھ کو پڑھ چکنے کے بعد بہت غصہ آیا کہ چونکہ میں نے یہ تحریر پڑھی ہے سو اب میں گدھا ہوں۔
بدلہ لینے کی ٹھانی ۔
دکان پر گئے سفید چونا، بالٹی ، کالا رنگ خریدا اور واپس آکر پہلے والی تحریر پر سفید چونا پھیر کر صاف کر دیا ۔ اب اس پر بڑی خوش خطی سے تحریر کیا
“لکھنے والا گدھا “
_________________
"When some blessings come to you, do not drive them away through thanklessness."(Imam Ali a.s.)
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:08 pm |
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askari.z55
Senior Proud Pakistani
Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 1511
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سردار اپنے بیٹے سے : تمہارے رزلٹ کا کیا بنا ؟ ۔ بیٹا :میڈم کہتی ہے اس کلاس میں ایک سال اور لگانا پڑے گا ۔ سردار: پھر ٹھیک ہے سال چاہے تین چار لگ جائیں پر فیل نہیں ہونا۔
_________________
"When some blessings come to you, do not drive them away through thanklessness."(Imam Ali a.s.)
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:13 pm |
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askari.z55
Senior Proud Pakistani
Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 1511
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کسی سردار سے پوچھا گیا
“سردار جی ۔ تُسی اینے دیش پریمی (محب وطن) ہو لیکن ہمیشہ غیرملکی چینل کیوں دیکھتے ہو ؟؟“
“ اپنے دیش پریمی ہونے کی وجہ سے ہی غیرملکی چینل دیکھتا ہوں جی ۔ “ سردار نے فخر سے جواب دیا۔
“لیکن غیرملکی چینل دیکھنے سے دیش پریمی ہونا کیسے ثابت ہوا “؟؟
“اوئے ۔ میں چاہتا ہوں کچھ بجلی دشمنوں کی بھی تو خرچ ہو “ سردار نے رازدارانہ انداز میں جواب دیا۔
_________________
"When some blessings come to you, do not drive them away through thanklessness."(Imam Ali a.s.)
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:23 pm |
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askari.z55
Senior Proud Pakistani
Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 1511
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ایک سردار جی کا بیٹا پیدا ہوا ۔ نرس نے آ کر ان کو آ کر بتایا کہ سردار جی ! آپ کا بیٹا ہوا ہے سردار جی خوش ہو کر نرس کے کان میں کہتے ہیں ــــــــ
" میری بیوی کو نہ بتانا میں اس کو سرپرائز دوں گا "
_________________
"When some blessings come to you, do not drive them away through thanklessness."(Imam Ali a.s.)
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:27 pm |
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askari.z55
Senior Proud Pakistani
Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 1511
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پرنام سنگھ نے رات چار بجے یونہی بیٹھے بیٹھے فون گھمادیا ۔ دوسری طرف نیند میں ڈوبی ہوئی آواز سنائی دی ۔
’’ہیلو ، کون بول رہا ہے ؟‘‘۔
پرنام سنگھ نے کہا۔ جی میں بول رہیا واں ۔
نیند میں سوتے شخص نے جھنجھلا کر کہا ۔ میں کون ؟
’’جی پرنام سنگھ‘‘۔ بھائی تسی مینوں نئیں جاندے ۔
دوسری طرف والا غصے سے بولا۔۔۔تے فیر رات دے چار بجے فون کیوں کیتا اِی؟۔
پرنام سنگھ نے جواب دیا ۔ ایس ویلے ٹیلی فون دی کال داریٹ گھٹ ہوندا اے ۔
_________________
"When some blessings come to you, do not drive them away through thanklessness."(Imam Ali a.s.)
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:28 pm |
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askari.z55
Senior Proud Pakistani
Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 1511
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ایک سردار جی فون کرنے کے لیے پی۔سی۔او گئے۔۔۔ وہاں جاکر انہوں نے آپریٹر کو دو تھپڑ ماردیئے۔۔۔۔
جانتے ہیں کیوں؟؟
وہاں لکھا تھا: "نمبر ملانے سے پہلے دو لگائیں۔" 
_________________
"When some blessings come to you, do not drive them away through thanklessness."(Imam Ali a.s.)
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:33 pm |
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askari.z55
Senior Proud Pakistani
Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 1511
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آج کی تازہ خبر
" پٹرول کی قیمت میں اضافہ کر دیا گیا "
سردار جی کے خیالات
" او جی مجھے تو کوئی فرق نہیں پڑتا۔۔۔ پہلے بھی 100 کا ڈلواتے تھے۔ اب بھی 100 کا ڈلوائیں گے
_________________
"When some blessings come to you, do not drive them away through thanklessness."(Imam Ali a.s.)
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:34 pm |
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askari.z55
Senior Proud Pakistani
Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 1511
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دو سردار بنک لوٹنے گئے، بنک پہنچے تو یاد آیا گن تو وہ گھر میں ہی بھول آئے ہیں۔ لیکن اس کے باوجود وہ بنک لوٹنے میں کامیاب ہو گئے، بھلا کیسے
بنک مینیجر بھی سردار تھا، اس نے کہا بنک آج لوٹ لو، گن کل دکھا جانا
_________________
"When some blessings come to you, do not drive them away through thanklessness."(Imam Ali a.s.)
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:36 pm |
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askari.z55
Senior Proud Pakistani
Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 1511
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ایک سردار کو اپنی بیوی کے افیئر کا پتہ چلا۔ اس نے فیصلہ کیا کہ وہ اپنی بیوی کو اور خود کو گولی مار دے گا۔ یہ سوچ کر وہ گھر گیا اور بیڈ پر بیوی کو سامنے بٹھا کر پستول نکال کر لوڈ کر کے اپنی کنپٹی پر رکھ دیا۔ بیوی ہنسنے لگی تو سردار غصے میں بولا
"اتنا خوش مت ہو، اگلا نمبر تمھارا ہے۔"
_________________
"When some blessings come to you, do not drive them away through thanklessness."(Imam Ali a.s.)
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:49 pm |
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askari.z55
Senior Proud Pakistani
Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 1511
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سردار : بیٹا تمہارے رزلٹ کا کیا بنا ۔
بیٹا: میڈم کہہ رہی تھی کہ ابھی ایک سال اور لگے گا ۔
سردار: کوئی بات نہیں بیٹا سال خواہ دو تین اور لگ جائیں لیکن فیل نہ ہونا
_________________
"When some blessings come to you, do not drive them away through thanklessness."(Imam Ali a.s.)
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:50 pm |
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shakeelmscw
Shayari Moderator
Joined: 22 Aug 2007
Posts: 5199
Location: United Arab Emirates |
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Santa : I went alone on our honeymoon. My wife had already seen Niagara Falls.
_________________
*(`'·.¸(`'·.¸*¤*¸.·'´)¸.·'´)*
«´¨`·.Shakeel Ahmed ..·´¨`»
*(¸.·'´(¸.·'´*¤*`'·.¸)`'·.¸)*
(((**A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes**)) |
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 9:29 pm |
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shakeelmscw
Shayari Moderator
Joined: 22 Aug 2007
Posts: 5199
Location: United Arab Emirates |
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But the psychiatrist really helped me a lot. I would never answer the phone, because I was afraid. Now I answer it whether it rings or not.
_________________
*(`'·.¸(`'·.¸*¤*¸.·'´)¸.·'´)*
«´¨`·.Shakeel Ahmed ..·´¨`»
*(¸.·'´(¸.·'´*¤*`'·.¸)`'·.¸)*
(((**A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes**)) |
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 9:31 pm |
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DreamzZ
Forum Family Member
Joined: 28 Nov 2007
Posts: 13118
Location: Blvd Of Broken DreamzZ |
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rof..LOL
_________________
Soorma fitna batil koo daba dety hain
Khoon dheky hwey zaroon koo pila dety hain
Apni goodo key chiragoon koo buja dety hain
Apny chandoon koo andery main dula dety hain
Misle --------- jo pegham umal dety hain
aisy hee loog zamany koo badal dety hain
No Promises |
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 10:45 pm |
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shakeelmscw
Shayari Moderator
Joined: 22 Aug 2007
Posts: 5199
Location: United Arab Emirates |
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A Chinese pair accidentally had twins without getting married;
Guess what they named them... Jo Hua, So Hua.
_________________
*(`'·.¸(`'·.¸*¤*¸.·'´)¸.·'´)*
«´¨`·.Shakeel Ahmed ..·´¨`»
*(¸.·'´(¸.·'´*¤*`'·.¸)`'·.¸)*
(((**A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes**)) |
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| Fri Dec 21, 2007 11:18 pm |
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Anne
5 Star Member
Joined: 17 Nov 2007
Posts: 3292
Location: Pakistan |
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Very Nice Collection of Jokes. . .
Thanks Shakeel and Askari for sharing with us!
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| Sat Dec 22, 2007 2:22 pm |
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shakeelmscw
Shayari Moderator
Joined: 22 Aug 2007
Posts: 5199
Location: United Arab Emirates |
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Very Nice Collection of Jokes. . .
Thanks Shakeel and Askari for sharing with us! |
You are welcome
_________________
*(`'·.¸(`'·.¸*¤*¸.·'´)¸.·'´)*
«´¨`·.Shakeel Ahmed ..·´¨`»
*(¸.·'´(¸.·'´*¤*`'·.¸)`'·.¸)*
(((**A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes**)) |
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| Sun Dec 23, 2007 12:06 am |
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DreamzZ
Forum Family Member
Joined: 28 Nov 2007
Posts: 13118
Location: Blvd Of Broken DreamzZ |
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lol@Ju Hua
rof---@su hua
_________________
Soorma fitna batil koo daba dety hain
Khoon dheky hwey zaroon koo pila dety hain
Apni goodo key chiragoon koo buja dety hain
Apny chandoon koo andery main dula dety hain
Misle --------- jo pegham umal dety hain
aisy hee loog zamany koo badal dety hain
No Promises |
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| Sun Dec 23, 2007 4:53 am |
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shakeelmscw
Shayari Moderator
Joined: 22 Aug 2007
Posts: 5199
Location: United Arab Emirates |
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lol@Ju Hua
rof---@su hua |
Chodro yaar Jo hua So hua 
_________________
*(`'·.¸(`'·.¸*¤*¸.·'´)¸.·'´)*
«´¨`·.Shakeel Ahmed ..·´¨`»
*(¸.·'´(¸.·'´*¤*`'·.¸)`'·.¸)*
(((**A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes**)) |
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| Sun Dec 23, 2007 8:34 pm |
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shakeelmscw
Shayari Moderator
Joined: 22 Aug 2007
Posts: 5199
Location: United Arab Emirates |
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Santa to his wife: darling, years ago u had a figure like coke bottle.
Jeeto: yes darling i still do, only differnece is earlier it was 300ml
now it's 1.5 ltr.
_________________
*(`'·.¸(`'·.¸*¤*¸.·'´)¸.·'´)*
«´¨`·.Shakeel Ahmed ..·´¨`»
*(¸.·'´(¸.·'´*¤*`'·.¸)`'·.¸)*
(((**A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes**)) |
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| Mon Dec 24, 2007 12:37 am |
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Anne
5 Star Member
Joined: 17 Nov 2007
Posts: 3292
Location: Pakistan |
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Santa to his wife: darling, years ago u had a figure like coke bottle.
Jeeto: yes darling i still do, only differnece is earlier it was 300ml
now it's 1.5 ltr. |
hehehe . . .
Mens are only after the figure . . .
Bad Bad Bad . . .
Thanks Shakeel!
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| Mon Dec 24, 2007 7:55 am |
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anjumm123I
Pak Newbie
Joined: 28 Dec 2007
Posts: 27
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What do you see look ino a sardar ji's eyes?
Back of his head!!!!!!
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| Fri Dec 28, 2007 7:22 am |
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shiraj
Pak Newbie
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 5
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| GOOD JOKES |
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SARDAR DETECTIVE
A policeman was testing 3 Singh brothers who were training to become
detectives.
To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the
first Singh a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it. "This is your
suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The first Singh answers, "That's
easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!" The policeman
says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture I showed is his side
profile."
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for
5 seconds at the second Singh and asks him, "This is your suspect, how
would
you recognize him?"
The second Singh smiles and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy
to catch because he only has one ear!" The policeman angrily responds,
"What's the matter with you two? Of course only one eye and one ear are
showing because it's a picture of his side profile! Is that the best answer
you can come up with?"
Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third Singh
and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would you
recognize him?
He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a stupid answer." The Singh
looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, "The suspect wears
contact lenses." The policeman is surprised and speechless because he
really
doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not. "Well, that's an
interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and
I'll get back to you on that." He leaves the room and goes to his office,
checks the suspect's file in his computer, and comes back with a beaming
smile on his face.
"Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does in fact wear contact
lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"
"That's easy," the Singh replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he
only has one eye and one ear." |
WELL, WE ARE BLAMING ROHIT FOR PRESENTING NEGATIVE IMAGE OF PAKISTANIS , BUT WHAT ARE WE DOING IN THESE JOKES . MAKING FUN OF A PARTICULAR COMMUNITY . THIS WILL NOT BRING ANYTHING POSITIVE . EVERYONE HAS TO TAKE RESPONSIBLITIES AND NO BODY SHOULD MAKE FUN OF ANY RELIGION OR RACE. MAY ALLAH BLESS EVERYBODY.
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| Fri Dec 28, 2007 8:47 am |
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